Isn’t it interesting when one reaches that point in life where one finally feels comfortable with rejecting, at least in part, some of those ideas one held so strongly in one’s youth? Perhaps you have yet to experience that. Perhaps it is yet to come. I hope so.
I do not hold with the thought that says we must cling to the ideals of our youth. At least not all of them. The ones that are rooted in notions of equality and fairness of course are timeless and exempt. But the one that suggested ‘love’ would/should be a forever full-on rush of adrenaline? Pah. The one that said a rejection of adulthood responsibility and a ‘forever young’ approach would save civilisation? Gimme a break.
It can be painful to read the words of one’s youth. Well, perhaps not painful exactly, but certainly a cause for eye-rolling wonder and vague embarrassment. And that notion that I once pedalled about clinging to the selfish egoism of youth and the rejection of the expectations of adulthood is one that currently bemuses me most. At least in part.
I think the reason I am wary of supporting what I once believed is that I now see similar threads evident in UK society that I consider to be dangerous and ill-conceived. For it seems to me that as each year goes by there is a further escalation in the fetishisation of children/youth. In parallel to that increasing fetishisation and commodification of children has been a similar rise in the paranoia of protection; the combination of the two I would argue is far from healthy for our youngsters and hence for the future of our society.
Even Melissa Benn, who I otherwise hold in high esteem, seems capable of falling into this parent trap. In an interview with Peter Wilby in today’s Guardian she admits that she “really, really enjoyed school." But then adds that "there were elements that, as a parent, I wouldn't have been happy with. I didn't feel unsafe exactly but I knew there were certain toilets I shouldn't go into, and there were pockets of disorder, things that frightened me, skinheads, gangs and so on. As a parent, you have to be in favour of order. On discipline, I think the right is on to something."
For me, this is the paranoia of the parent at play. I would argue that those experiences as a youngster were crucial in developing her understanding of life and preparation for going out into that legendary ‘real world’. They didn’t seem to do her any real harm, did they? I don’t think a degree of fear is necessarily a bad thing to experience as a youngster. Fear is part of life outside of school. Let’s not pretend it isn’t. As school leaders and teachers we can, should and do strive to make our learning environments as supportive, inclusive and happy as we possibly can. That’s an incredibly complex set of challenges when dealing with, say, 1500 teenagers. But let’s be realistic and acknowledge that human nature and the influences of previous generations will make it next to impossible to eradicate the sense of fear that comes from mixing with youngsters from different backgrounds. As I say, for me that’s part of the learning process, and ironically, earlier in the same interview Benn herself asks “how do we learn about others if we never come in contact with them?” Well that’s as much about coming into contact with the toughs from the council estates as it is about contact with other religions and cultures. And yes, that can be scary, intimidating and emotionally challenging for adults as well as youngsters. But then no-one said life was easy.
The culture of cosseting of children needs to be overturned. On holiday in Spain recently we spotted a large poster advertising an art exhibition. The poster featured a painting of a naked child. You can just imagine the outcry if that appeared in the UK; the Daily Mail proclaiming that we must “ban this filth” and protect our children whilst running a fawning story about celebrity babies outfitted in designer baby garb and sensationalising ‘sexy’ young pop artistes as something to aspire to.
But then I’m not a parent, so what do I know? I’m just getting older.
And possibly grumpier.
Intriguing, enigmatic opening 3 paragaphs, Duke -- I wasn't quite sure how they connected to the rest of your article.
I would tend to agree that some children are sometimes given too much attention - but then, like you, I am not a parent, and parents would say that that is why I don't share their view of things. Perhaps it is too easy for someone like me to try to judge these things from the outside.
re your specific issue of youth and fear ... well, it is bad to be physically attacked and hurt. I don't think there is any defence for this, and I don't think I would want to justify violence as 'all part of growing up'.
Fear of violence is a different thing from violence. Maybe you think violence is bad, but fear of violence can be a good, character-forming thing?
Your talk about youth reminds me of my own thoughts. I yesterday read a Jackie Ashley article in yesterday's Guardian with disbelief. She complained that there is 'nowhere for young people to go'. She thinks they should be able to go and drink a bottle of vodka - something I never even touched till I was in my 20s. She also says they can't go to cafes as they are too expensive (though she thinks they should go to pubs, despite being under-age, and though pubs are dearer than cafés). It was mind-boggling.
It all led me back to a familiar old thought, namely that youth today don't seem to have the same experience that I did, or even that my contemporaries did. Example: apparently teenage pregnancy is now thought to be a problem. When I was a teenager, I never even heard of, let alone knew, a teenager getting pregnant. This kind of thing was just unknown.
So in talking about young people today we are apparently starting from a different place from our own youth, whether for good or ill.
Posted by: joe | August 30, 2011 at 14:24